Friday, January 11, 2008

Put down the shovel

"That's unfortunate."

The rest of our talk went okay, if she was being truthful. She says she has a really difficult time taking tests. She said she attended class, turned in work, kept up, but just doesn't do well at test taking. My suggestion was to take a workshop in test taking offered by her school. I also suggested that she re-take this past semester while at least some of the content was fresh and to concentrate on learning some new test taking skills.

I did not tell Bick what she said. I'm not sure about that decision, but I do know that I don't want to get myself into a position as go-between. I spent enough years refereeing my own kin, I will not freely take up the whistle again.

I'd say the odds of her being successful are 50-50.

"You aren't doing any of the right stuff to allow yourself to get the hell out of Dodge. Your dad isn't going to pay for you to go anywhere if you are going to flunk out. If you want to go to school somewhere else, you need to get your shit together. You aren't hurting anybody but yourself. If you flunk out of junior college, there is no place else for you to go."
- paraphrasing Pebbles Stone, when Sandy told her of her issues with school.

I wasn't privy to the above exchange, as I was playing with Pebbles' cat. I took Sandy into Dallas so that we could talk en route, meet Pebbles at her very artsy, very cute and cool and hip apartment and have dinner at a place of their choosing. It was my hope that Pebbles could provide a little inspiration and insight. Pebbles worked in the office that assisted academically at-risk students at my university beginning with part-time summer work when she was 13 continuing through her junior year of college. Turns out, Pebbles was not particularly sympathetic. I hope that no relationship damage happened - Pebbles doesn't think it did.


  1. I really like what Pebbles told her. You flunk out of CC, where the hell else is there to go?

    I hope she doesn't expect you to be able to pull any magic strings, what with where you work and all. We've all had enough time on the therapists couch to know what she's pulling. Getting her to see it is the challenge. Good luck and stay detached!!

  2. One book I would recommend to her is: "Test-Taking Strategies and Study Skills for the Utterly Confused" by Laurie Rozakis, Ph.D.
    As all of us know, what is most important is her desire and willingness to make the effort to do better.


We'll try this for a while.